Do you have a favorite holiday? Why or why not?ġ3. Are you into podcasts or do you only listen to music?ġ2. What was the last TV show you binge-watched?ġ1. Would you say you’re more of an extrovert or an introvert?ġ0. What are your hobbies, and how did you get into them?Ħ. Where’s the next place on your travel bucket list and why?ĥ. What was the best vacation you ever took and why?Ĥ. What’s your favorite way to spend a day off?ģ. "Commonalities often open the door for further conversation and, once that door is open, you can start a dialogue that allows the other person to elaborate and not give close-ended answers," Williams adds.ġ. For example, "If you find out they like dogs, take it a bit deeper by asking them what they like most about their dog or their favorite breed," Hendrix explains. The important thing here is to go deeper by asking follow-up questions. "Asking someone about their preferences helps you to understand who they are as a person," says Rebecca Hendrix, LMFT, a therapist in New York. Not sure where to start? Here are 260 not-boring questions to use anytime you want to get to know someone better: Rebecca Hendrix, LMFT, is a New York-based licensed marriage and family therapist. Tamekis Williams, LCSW, is the founder of Mission Dorothy Female Empowerment Services. Meet the experts: Terri Orbuch, PhD, is a relationship expert, therapist, and author of 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great. What about you, do you love where you live?'" "An example would look like: 'I just moved to Georgia last year and found a beautiful community that I fell in love with and purchased a home. "You can get the answers by sometimes answering those questions yourself while sharing about you," says Williams. To get someone else to open up, it can also be an effective strategy to take the lead in getting a little vulnerable. Remember, you're just trying to get to know them, so you can save all those heavy hitters for another time (maybe). ![]() Depending on the person, for example, it might feel safer to avoid questions about political and religious beliefs. ![]() Still, you want to be mindful of your approach and choose questions that don't feel critical or like an invasion of privacy, says Williams. "When initially meeting someone, it's important to be inviting and warm so that the other person can initially feel comfortable talking with you." "Sharing personal information strengthens any relationship, and deeper questions focus on that personal self-disclosure."Īnd that goes for both parties, adds Williams. "Topics that get at the other person's inner world-their thoughts, goals, and dreams-will strengthen and increase bonding between two people," Orbuch notes. This can include questions about their family, career, et cetera.Īdditionally, you want to avoid any "yes" or "no" questions and aim for the open-ended ones instead, says Tamekis Williams, LCSW, the founder of Mission Dorothy Female Empowerment Services. Starting with "breadth questions" is a great way to take any convo from awkward small talk to comfortable real talk, according to Terri Orbuch, PhD, a relationship expert, therapist, and author of 5 Simple Steps to Take Your Marriage from Good to Great. (Think: Your very hard-to-impress mother-in-law.) Luckily, there are a few expert-approved tricks that'll help you get on your conversation A-game. And sometimes, those interactions are unavoidable. Then, of course, there's the flip side of that-where as much as you want to warm up to someone and vice versa, every chat with them feels terribly stiff. You know the feeling: The conversation just flows, everything feels easy, and before you know it, hours have passed by. ![]() Meeting someone new that you're able to click with easily is so refreshing.
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